In December 2015, President Obama signed the federal version of Erin's Law providing federal funding toschools to provide this education. Sexually abused and raped from age 6-8 by an adult neighbor Erin was threatened to stay silent by her abuser. If someone ever does touch you in those areas, you tell immediately., Merryn suggests the books The Swimsuit Lesson and The Right Touch.. The next steps for the bill remain unknown. Every parent should do their homework before they send their kids anywhere. 25 $. (Read why most child abuse goes unreported). Seconds later his hand was down her pants. Erin Merryn's memoir is about how her life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted."I thought when the abuse stopped I could move on with my life. According to Merryn, every school gets the option to pick a Erins Law program, and have an outside agency teach. ThediaryIkept my secrets locked away in, where I lost my innocence, I turned into a book mysenior year of high school called Stolen Innocence, because thats whathappened to me, Merryn said. Again, she was told to keep quiet, that no one would believe her if she said anything and that she had no proof. (Stacey Wescott / Chicago Tribune) During her quest,. After graduating, Erin went on to earn her Masters degree in social work, but from time to time she would still consult her little pink childhood diary. She broke down and cried and said Erin's Law could have saved her as a child, but instead she only got the message from her abuser, who she knew, and stayed silent. The only difference is now I am running from him in my dreams" (Merryn 49). She was also afraid she would lose her innocence. Our Spectrum News app is the most convenient way to get the stories that matter to you. According to the Office of the Monmouth County Prosecutors website, the only time that Megans Law information will be released to parents or families of students is if the school receives a Tier III high risk notice concerning an offender living within a 1,000-foot radius of their location. To a child who has been told so many threats to stay silent the idea of being taken to a police station can often scare a child. Acting out both at home and in school, she was given an IEP (Individual Education Plan) and was told she was just going through a phase; that her parents brief separation was the probable root cause. By speaking up even when family is against the idea, it is freedom for a survivor and allows them to reclaim a piece of their lives back. Two of those children were my sister and I. I was a senior in high school when I published my first book, my childhood diary where I kept my secrets of abuse with my cousin locked away. MORE: Cancer-surviving mom stays strong for her son. In 2010, Merryn began a crusade to get Erin's Law passed across America. Merryn: The first thing someone can do is start talking about it. At no time should the school provide the information directly to the student (unless the student is over 18). It is when they hear my story of how I was raped, and how my abusers controlled the situation by being the only ones talking to me about what was happening, that they "get it." You have permission to edit this article. Merryn, then 6, was excited about her first sleepover with her kindergarten classmate Ashley. She is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for . After her parents decided to move Erins abuse ended but only brought her that much closer to her next abuser, an older teenage cousin who lived down the street from her. As I describe in my books, that center was the foundation of my healing. The path to justice for survivors of sexual assault is not an easy road. "It's something that is going to be with me the rest of my life," Erin said. Ensuring all New Jersey kids have access to age-appropriate sexual abuse prevention education will end the cycle of abuse before it begins. This law could have given me the ability to know I would be believed, that this is not a secret to keep, and how to report it. Known For. She was named Glamour Magazine Woman of the Year in 2012 and a People magazine Hero Among Us for her tireless work promoting Erin's Law nationwide with a mission to our keep children safe by educating them about personal body safety. But her nightmare was just beginning. After reading that letter, a switch flipped inside Erin. Two days later, their cousin was brought into the police station. But nothing prepared her for two traumatizing events that have turned Merryn, now 25, into an activist, determined to prevent the same thing from happening to other children. Before . Erin Elizabeth was sexually abused from 11-13 by her older cousin. Children must be taught to tell a trusted adult if anyone touches their private parts. Erin says she believes everyone is born with a purpose and she has found hers through the events that have occurred in her life. Ill never be abused again, its just all gonna go away.. She knew exactly what she was doing by asking simple questions on my life, friends, what I did for fun, and my family. She is not ashamed of the sexual abuse she endured as a child and, instead, feels inspired to put a face and voice on childhood sexual abuse. Erin wanted nothing more than to make him feel the hurt that she did. The areas covered by your swimsuit are not for anyone to be touching, unless mommy and daddy are helping you with a bath. Eventually, her parents and sisters moved to another town, closer to family. Erin first gained public attention for this cause when she self-published her first book while still a senior in high school in Schaumburg IL, entitled: Stolen Innocence: Triumphing Over a Childhood Broken by Abuse: A Memoir. You seem incredibly resilient. However, she said theabuseand rape continueduntil she was almost nine. One personal safety lesson learned at school that actually helped me in life was "stranger danger." The first abuser, our neighbor, is someone I think who did this to any girl he had access to. Visiting Alaska this week, Erin Merryn is a long way from home, and even farther from the torturous past she endured as a sexually abused child. They talked for hours about what had happened, and the next day told their parents about their shared horror. High near 60F. I really open lawmakers' eyes when I share this with them. Merryn spoke to members of the Ohio SenatePrimary and Secondary Education Committee of how she was sexually abused as a child. I wanted to know why, and when I asked if he was abused, he denied it and said he abused me out of curiosity and an urge of sexuality. She is an activist against child sexual abuse. He doesnt sleep out ever. From the age of 11 to 13, I was repeatedly sexually abused at the hands of a family member, an older cousin, she said. Merryn is now taking her fight to the state of Alabama. In Living for Today, readers find that Erin cultivated the strength to face her abuser . Eventually though the conversation has to shift and that question that I will never forget. After graduating with Bachelors and Masters Degrees in social work from Western Illinois and Aurora Universities in 2008 and 2009, Health Communications published her second book, Living for Today: From Incest and Molestation to Fearlessness and Forgiveness. It would be many more years until that voice would become the strong, confident woman that I have become. Her dad had to sit down and have a tough conversation with his sister, and denial followed. At first, it happened when she was babysitting her younger cousins and their older brother would arrive home before their mother. Alaska Dispatch: Do you think most lawmakers meaningfully comprehend the issue of sexual abuse? Sorry, there are no recent results for popular commented articles. Buccos legislation has received support from prominent victims rights advocates and support organizations, including Morris County advocate Richard Pompelio; and Patrice Lenowitz, founder and executive director of The Nurtured Parent Support Group for Survivors of Domestic Abuse, a Bergen County organization serving survivors and protective parents across the state. Its word for word my diary from the ages of 10 until my senior year of high school. Merryn now. She wasn't always successful. InDecember 2015 President Obama signed thefederal version of Erin's Law providing federal funding for schools to use. She told them that, growing up in Illinois, she had experienced tornado drills, fire drills and bus drills; was taught about stranger danger and eight ways to say no to drugs through D.A.R.E., but no one ever taught her how to protect herself from sexual abuse and what to do if a family member or friend molested or raped her. This law requires personal body safety taught to children Pre-K to 12th grade through an age appropriate curriculum. All rights reserved. Merryn kept her confusion to herself. Erin's Law, named after Erin Merryn, has passed in 36 states and is pending in the other 14. Merryn: Yes. So before CAC's a child brought to a police station could be filled with anxiety and fear that they are in trouble. Meanwhile, the survivor who came up with the idea aftersufferingher own personal horrors shared her story with senators Tuesday. It turned out cousin Brian was abusing Merryns little sister, too. It was the first federal bill passed funding sexual abuse prevention education. What are the most persistent knowledge gaps? MORE: Moms and dads, can we talk about stranger danger? As a result, she has been interviewed by many major news organizations and TV programs beginning in 2006, on Good Morning America, Oprah, CNN, Today Show, Fox, Katie Couric, Nightline, TLC, OWN, MSNBC, People Magazine, Time Magazine, Glamour Magazine, USA Today, London Times, New York Times, Chicago Tribune, and dozens more local media. Erin Merryn detailed the treatment and help she received from the Children's Advocacy Center, which has 900 locations across the U.S.A. - a safe environment for children to share their stories of abuse. Erins Law encourages research based curriculum, Merryn said. Merryn: My resilience took a lot of psychological help growing up as a kid, teen, and young adult. Low near 30F. Its somebody they know and trust.. The first episode began on a warm May night in 1991. Alaska Dispatch: You have since spoken up in a big way. I had all the warning signs of an abused kid -- labeled behavior(ally) and emotionally disturbed, given an IEP (Individual Education Plan) for that behavior, I had anger problems, put my hand through a window weeks after being raped at 7 years old and threw tantrums on the floors in school. Here's a glimpse of her life and why she's on a quest for social change. Erin Merryn, A Voice for the Voiceless. Soon it was no longer our secret and I was behind a different closed door not the one to a bedroom, a bathroom, basement, or closet but this time into a colorful room with a small table and bright light shinning through the skylight. 4 mos. He knows the parts covered by his underwear and bathing suit arent for anyone to touch or see and he knows who safe people are if he ever needs help with something. So be careful sending little Tommy for ice at the machine down the hall and inform teens who often book motels after prom. The bill had already passed the House . At a family gathering at her grandparents' lake house, she awoke in the middle of the night to find her cousin "Brian" (again, not his real name), then 13 . She is an activist against child sexual abuse as well as the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety in order to prevent child sexual abuse. Merryn says her abuse ended when the family moved to a new neighborhood, Schaumburg, Illinois but she took her secret with her. A safe touch could be a high five or hug and an unsafe touch is someone touching you in the areas covered by your swimsuit, or your private parts, Merryn said. My sister and I told our parents the next day (and) we were referred to the Children's Advocacy Center by police detectives to be interviewed. We've had an unprecedented change for our Gingerbread House Partners in Prevention 2021 Luncheon and we couldn't be more excited! Requiring personal body safety education in public schools. The girls were brought to a Children's Advocacy Center where they had to tell their stories to complete strangers, something Erin wasnt looking forward to at all. Read more about Erins Law at www.erinslaw.org, or about Erin herself at www.erinmerryn.net. Sexually abused and raped from age 6-8 by an adult neighbor Erin was threatened to stay silent by her abuser. She was abused. Was this just bad luck? Caught you off guard? Merryn's family, including her two sisters, moved to another neighborhood in the same town when Merryn was 8, and she stopped seeing Ashley. It was so brutal I thought I was dying, Merryn, Glamour magazines 2012 Woman of the Year, recalled in an interview with the Asbury Park Press. It was a detailed account of how an officer came to her school to talk about stranger danger. Erin decided at a young age to take a stand against evil and expose the silent epidemic of child sexual abuse in the spotlight. I went to bed night after night crying into my pillow having nightmares, and keeping my secrets locked away in my childhood diary., Merryn found her voice at 13 when her younger sister said the words shell never forget: Brians gross!. Erin's Law is the first US child sexual abuse prevention education law requiring children be educated in schools. Last week the law passed in two more states, Virginia and Wyoming, bringing the total to 34. Author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today Merryn: What caused me to come forward was unfortunately finding out that my little sister was also being abused. Silence Broken and Stigmas Shattered -- Help for Incest Survivors Is Here Fans of Erin Merryn's heart-wrenching debut memoir Stolen Innocence were left wondering at the end what would become of an emotionally fragile Erin after her confrontation with the reality of being a child of incest and molestation. Today there are more then 700 Children Advocacy Centers in America and millions of children have walked through those doors.Before there were CAC's children were interviewed numerous times in places such as police stations. Forgiving him did not mean what he did was right, she stressed. Merryn: There is so much shame and stigma attached to sexual abuse. He told me, "Your goal is to convince everyone else." I tell parents the best way to talk to kids about this is through the swimsuit lesson, Merryn said. I am a survivor. Merryn successfully passed it in her state of Illinois in 2013 and has been traveling from one state capital to another testifying to state lawmakers to . Mar 22, 2018 Erin Merryn, survivor of sexual abuse as a child and the driving force behind Erin's Law, speaks to an auditorium full of students at Metamora Township High School last Monday, March 12. For the next hour I relived as much as I was capable of sharing and just kept finding myself focusing on the large mirror having no clue their was a detective on the other side listening to my entire story and am very glad I did not know. The founder of Erin's Law. CBN News Self - Children's Advocate. I also tell parents don't give childrens private parts pet names. He continued to abuse her on and off for nearly two years, she says, often at holidays and celebrations with her close-knit extended family. "He told me, just like in the past by this other perpetrator, 'Erin, this is our . Merryn: I have witnessed some lawmakers come in voting against the bill who got on their mic after hearing me testify and (told) me they had all planned to vote against this bill and that my testimony changed their mind. The brilliant minds behind putting in place a center that had a home away from home feeling to give children a sense of security and comfort.At thirteen was the age I walked through the CAC. Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. Children are taught that the police are their to keep their communities safe and lock up the bad people. Forgiveness set me free. The fact that a motel is not telling families that sex offenders are living there should be a crime, Merryn said. Erin Merryn is an author (Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, An Unimaginable Act), activist, and founder of Erin's Law. Realizing I was not a fault and learning to let go of the guilt. Then, after seven months of back-and-forths, he wrote a heartfelt apology to Erin and asking for her forgiveness, but also understanding if she couldnt forgive him. Who were they? 5 talking about this. For so many years I stayed angry and bitter towards him. Lawmakers are in the dark about this. How I wondered am I suppose to tell this stranger my pain when I am too ashamed to even talk in detail with my parents about it. The man, then in his late 20s, abused her several more times in the next year, including, she says, raping her during a daytime visit when she thought he wouldn't be home. When all you have ever been told by an abuser is to stay silent, no one will believe you, this is our secret, you learn to believe that, and (it) makes it extremely difficult to speak up about. JANESVILLE, Wis. (WMTV) - Illinois woman Erin Merryn spoke in Wisconsin Wednesday, pushing the state to pass the law in her namesake that aims to protect children and prevent child sexual abuse. No one is allowed in the bathroom with you not even your friend. Get the best experience and stay connected to your community with our Spectrum News app. Forgiving him allowed me to move forward with my life and decide to no longer let this thing be something I should be ashamed of, no longer allowing it to be a negative in my life, but letting it be a positive.. The law was passed in a number of states,[7] with New York becoming the 37th in 2019. She is an activist against child sexual abuse as well as the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety in order to prevent child sexual abuse. In the wee hours of the night, Ashley's uncle "Richard" (not his real name), who lived in the house with his niece, appeared in the darkened room. The next day they told their parents. How do we lessen the control these pressures have on ourselves, our loved ones? Read more Oh and of course my cousin's voice echoing through my head "No one will believe you, you have no proof, you will destroy this family, this is our secret!" Those were just the number of children who broke their silence that year. The Church Sex Abuse Scandals Around the World, Child-Abuse Case Reveals Vietnam's Lax Social Services, (Read why most child abuse goes unreported). If they feel they are in danger or in an uncomfortable situation, they can call home and use the code word, something as simple as, I forgot my math homework at school. . Alaska's version of Erin's Law is currently under consideration by the Alaska State Legislature as House Bill 233. I found (the) freedom and peace I had longed for. But when it came to being sexually abused, there was nothing. Erin Merryn (Author) Format: Kindle Edition See all formats and editions Kindle $12.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $16.10 35 Used from $2.70 5 New from $12.50 Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. But then, it started happening behind closed doors at crowded family functions. Bucco introduced Erins Law (S-2145) on May 2. Erin has spoken at over 250 CAC events.In 2008 she began writing legislators to require personal body safety be taught to kids in school. "Growing up in the suburbs of Chicago, I met my best friend in kindergarten. Merryn didn't tell anyone until she was 13 and she suspected her sister was also being abused. I also learned in group how to create a safe place to escape to when memories flooded my memory.While I was not ready at thirteen and fourteen to immediately share the journey of what all I went through because I was still too ashamed the Children's Advocacy Center laid the foundation in my healing to one day let that voice be heard. Hes grown into quite the little man and doesnt want me near the bathroom when he showers or gets dressed and I respect that. See her personal website at ErinMerryn.net. Merryn spoke to members of the Ohio Senate Primary and Secondary Education Committee of how she was sexually abused as a child. I came from a good home, two parents, good schools, safe neighborhood, etc. Sharing those details can be difficult because as survivors, they bring us back to the place where we endured the horror. Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, and An Unimaginable Act. I also give lots of insight and resources to parents in my third book An Unimaginable Act on warning sings to look for like bed wetting, wearing extra layers of clothes, avoiding a certain person, not wanting to be around them when they had no problem before, academic changes in school, depression, withdrawal, nightmares, aggression; acting out sexually, she said. I was abused. How did you find this voice? Senator Gillibrand on the federal version of Erin's Law to give federal funding to the law, and in December 2015 President Obama signed the federal version of Erin's Law under the Every Student Succeeds Act. 2022 Anchorage Daily News. She was taught how to ride out a tornado, instructed in the eight steps for turning down illegal drugs, and told how to react to a friendly stranger who might try to abduct her. It would have given me courage to know that I didn't have to live in constant fear that they could hurt me, and hurt me even worse if I told anyone. 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